I will come right out with it.
I don’t think I am the same person that I was when this pandemic started.
Not diminishing in the least how lucky I am to be well when so many have suffered and paid the ultimate sacrifice, there were many moments in the past year when I have resented being locked away.
My life felt like it was on hold, and at times, as if time itself stood still.
Especially as I am getting older when every minute counts.
I live alone and have not seen my family or most of my friends since last October, and then only for a few hours.
Somehow I have been kept going with my work, social-distanced walks with neighbours, and the intuitive feeling that despite the lack of seemingly moving forward, I have been evolving anyway.
As I said, I don’t feel like the same person that I was more than a year ago.
So what has changed?
It’s hard to put my finger on it exactly but my priorities have shifted I think. Let me give you an example.
I am a big fan of Rhonda Britton and her book Fearless Living.
She has an exercise in her book where one chooses from a list of 10 words to determine what she calls one’s “Essential Nature.”
Britton defines this as the “state of being that fuels your passion and gives you an abiding sense of purpose.”
Here are the Ten Words:
The idea is to pick the ONE word which speaks to you, about you, more than any of the others.
Well, that was the word I picked 10 years ago when I did this exercise for the first time.
In fact, I have spent my life with an insatiable drive to be courageous.
I enjoyed that role but I realize now that it was driven by ego as if I would not be good enough if I didn’t do that. Being out in the world everday just fed that impulse.
I just happened to pick up this book again a little while ago. This time, surprisingly a new word came to the forefront.
You could have bowled me over with a feather.
Me? Single lady, career woman, a champion for independence and self-reliance.
Well, that’s what a year of solitude has done for me.
It has broken down my walls. Peeled away those exhausting layers of feeling that I have to prove myself.
How ironic during a pandemic.
Proof that stagnation is but an illusion.
What about you? How have you changed?
Let’s Celebrate Other Women
Who Are Growing and Changing!
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The House That Julia Built!
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SATURDAY MAY 8th at 12:30 pm EST/9:30 am Pacific
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